I’d be remiss not to acknowledge that it’s been over 3 years since I have stored my words, my thoughts, my feelings on this little block of the internet so anyone can take a peek. There is a myriad of reasons why..some I may start to peel back and work through here over the coming days and months, and others that may never make it to the pages.
In our lives, we sometimes measure in blocks….before we were married…before we had kids….before we changed jobs….before tragedy struck….before before before…
My words here were originally intended as one of those “befores”…. Before the kids go to college. When I started this site, I knew we had about a thousand days left. A thousand days to capture the highs, the lows, and all of the in between, and a thousand days for me to hold space to create memories and have a record to sift through once again many thousand days from now.
But my pause came from an “after”. After the unexpected, after the direction life threw us in that none of us saw coming. To be honest, I froze. In so many ways, I didn’t have words. I didn’t allow myself to process and I guarded my heart and my feelings and our privacy with fierceness I had never felt before. It’s been a little over a thousand days since that last post and so much has happened. Yes, there have been hard days, but there has been so much joy, so much celebration, so much growth, and I will need to forgive myself for not leveraging this space and these words.
But I’m back. For now at least. And it’s because of another before and after. My next post will be about Mother’s Day, and about the tragedy my own Mother faced and the beauty that has unfolded in the after.
I hope you’ll come along and maybe there is some peace that you can find as I work through my own. Thanks for being here a thousand days ago…the before… and thanks for being here now. The new after.
-H
Our Thousand Days 